Cutting It Out Too Soon

Discovery

I was thinking about what direction my imagery might take after leaving Texas for the Illinois prairie. Corn seemed like the obvious point of departure. At the same time I found myself wanting to loosen up and paint cropped nude selfies on flat panels. I even started wondering whether the two belonged together.

That wasn’t the discovery.


Observation

My paintings have been composed and planned almost completely in Photoshop. By the time I start painting, I’ve already solved every creative problem. The act of painting becomes execution instead of discovery and play. I realized I’d been solving the painting before I ever touched paint.

I’ve been looking for ways to create art that is less precious. Less resolved. Less designed. The obvious thought was that I should try painting looser and faster but having tried that, I began to consider trying to find a way of working that didn’t require making so many irreversible decisions early in the process.


Old Process

The way I have been working turned into a close ended process of executing a finalized idea:

  1. Composing and design in Photoshop
  2. Tracing imagery onto precisely measured pickets
  3. Cutting the image shapes out
  4. Sanding and proming all of the edges
  5. Painting details inside the area defined by the cutouts
  6. Assembling the cutouts into the final piece I had made digitally

The results were very controled and intentional. The pieces were all very precious and precise, but they rarely surprised me.


New Process

I was mulling over how I could leave it more open ended if I didn’t trace the images and cut them out, but rather, building them up organically and loosely and playfully before cutting them out.

  • Begin with a painted rectangle.
  • Let the image emerge.
  • Allow mistakes.
  • Allow ideas to appear while painting.
  • Discover the edge afterward.
  • Cut later.
  • Assemble later still.

Even the assembly will be open ended as some images will need to be cut or replaced. Images I don’t end up using can be saved and introduced as needed into later pieces.

Key realization:

Move irreversible decisions farther down the process.


Precision vs. Predetermination

Precision isn’t the enemy. It just doesn’t need to be the default. It can be one technique I used to give emphasis and contrast as beautifully rendered anchor images. Tracing and precision still has a place. Photographic realism still has a place. What changes is when to use them and how to combine them with more expressive and unplanned discoveries.


Assembly

Even the assembly stage will require me to give up control and compose in response to 1000 happy accidents. Wrangling form on the fly rather than trying to tame it on the computer.

  1. Clamp first.
  2. Look at it.
  3. Rearrange.
  4. Remove.
  5. Add.
  6. Leave it alone.
  7. Return later.
  8. Commit.

The object should negotiate with me instead of obeying me.


Unexpected Discovery

The leftovers that are made, the pieces that are edited out during assembly, aren’t to be wasted. I suspect the pieces I remove during assembly shouldn’t be thrown away. They may become an accidental library I can draw from later. Time will tell whether they become useful, but I’d rather discover that in the studio than decide now that they’re scrap.

I want to give future paintings the opportunity to cannibalize pieces of earlier ones, creating a shared history that will tie them together visually and conceptually. A shared DNA. The body of work literally begins feeding itself.


About the Corn

Corn isn’t the subject. It’s the setting. I’m not interested in becoming “the corn guy.” I’m interested in what the prairie reveals about cultivation, order and the ordinary symbols people build their lives around. Whether corn becomes a recurring image or quietly stays in the background is something I’ll discover by making the work.


About the Nudes

The economy of nude swapping that exists has made the prototypical, oddly cropped arm extended, high angle selfie a part of pop culture. Some level sexuality helps to create a tension between form and meaning. The interest in this subject lies in the strange visual language of anonymous selfie compositions.

Cropping, awkward angles, deliberate omission of identifiable features. Nude images are created and shared as communication rather than art…which of course I want to appropriate and turn into art through a change of context, but how that will be achieved is still unresolved.


Bigger Discovery

This wasn’t really a metatation about corn. Or nudes. It was about finding a way to let the work surprise me again.

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

CORN NUDES

I’ve been thinking a lot about combining two themes I’ve been exploring: corn and nudes.

Along the way, I’ve been collecting thoughts, phrases, images and ideas about where that combination might lead. This is a live document. It may eventually grow to include more complete ideas for individual pieces, but for now it’s a place to dump all the little nuggets I collect before they fall out of my head and disappear forever.

🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜

  • uncanny orderliness of the Midwest
  • The nude selfie is a body disciplined into an image.
  • The weeds in the ditch are more representative of what this place naturally is than the cornfield.
  • offensively benign.
  • Each becomes this tiny interruption in an otherwise absurdly controlled biological surface.
    • a grain elevator
    • a farmhouse
    • a water tower
    • a turbine
    • an interstate overpass
    • a utility pole
    • an abandoned silo
    • a billboard
    • a church steeple
    • a little copse of trees
    • a drainage ditch
    • a single volunteer plant
    • a deer standing at the edge
    • a highway sign
    • a motel sign
    • a truck stop sign
  • Piekets are rows of corn stencils
    • rows of kernels on top of row of plants
    • the gaps betwen pickets could reveal chaos of weeds.
    • each picket could have a different scale, colors, background color,
  • And corn itself doesn’t have to be the villain.
    • Corn didn’t do anything.
    • We did.
    • Poor stupid adorable corn.
  • CROP
    • top of plant that is cut off (corn)
    • cutting edges of an image (selfies)
    • same origin – crop the plant to get the product (corn), crop a photo to get the product (tits)
  • FIELD
    • manufactured reality
    • straight
    • distant
    • repetitive
    • orthogonal
    • vast
    • hard-edged
    • public
    • industrial
  • NUDE
    • crooked
    • close
    • awkward
    • foreshortened
    • intimate
    • fragmentary
    • soft
    • private
    • LOOK AT THIS BODY.
    • vs
    • LOOK AT WHAT THIS PERSON DECIDED TO SHOW YOU.
    • The missing information becomes as important as the visible information.
      • Face outside frame.
      • One breast.
      • Part of stomach.
      • Shoulder disappearing.
      • Bathroom mirror.
      • Bed sheet.
      • Doorway.
      • Flash reflection.
      • A hand holding clothing aside.
      • The strange distortion produced by a phone held too close.
      • Light blowing out part of the body.
      • Blackness swallowing another.
      • And that wonderful accidental geometry created because the photograph wasn’t composed as Art.
      • It was composed as communication.
  • Vertical seams/pickets could become:
    • corn rows
    • phone-screen divisions
    • agricultural property lines
    • body fragmentation
  • There’s also a vocabulary emerging here.
  • Not necessarily titles. Just words I’d put on your studio wall:
    • CROP
    • FIELD
    • YIELD
      • A field yields.
      • A body yields.
      • A photograph yields an image.
      • An investment yields a return.
      • A person yields control.
    • EXPOSURE
    • CULTIVATED
    • VOLUNTEER
    • SELECTED
    • HYBRID
    • FEED
    • FERTILE
    • DESIRABLE
    • PRODUCT
    • GRADE
    • CHOICE
    • FLESH
    • ACRE
    • BUSHEL
    • BODY
    • PROPERTY
    • BOUNDARY
    • CONTROL
  • looking at things long enough that the familiar becomes strange.
  • an adorable little ear of corn—the most harmless fucking thing imaginable—becomes the smiling mascot sitting on top of an enormous machine for turning land into product.
  • Both the corn and the nude are cultivated images.
  • unruly biological thing
  • The edge where bedroom becomes field could have the same razor-straight quality you noticed along Illinois roads.
    • nude, corn Hard edge
    • weeds invade the nude’s space.
    • the weeds are echoed in the crack between the corn pickets
  • Pin up is commodity, corn is commodity…unnatural, cultivated, manufactured
    • she holds corn, advertises corn, is corn
    • on top of weeds, over lapped, dropped on, displacing
    • Make her beautifully cultivated.
    • Pinup language.
    • Commercial photography.
    • Maybe even some of your Sailor-Jerry vocabulary creeping in.
    • Smooth skin. Lovely breast. Perfect curve.
    • And behind her:
      • ditch
      • collapsed grain elevator
      • rust
      • concrete
      • weeds
      • utility infrastructure
      • scrub trees
      • power lines
      • Corn.
      • Pinup.
      • Silo.
      • Weeds.
      • Angel.
      • Turbine.
      • Breast.
      • Grain elevator.
      • Banner.
      • Farmhouse.
      • Cloud.
      • Utility pole.
      • Heart.
      • Highway sign.
    • Now she’s functioning almost exactly like the perfect corn.
    • She’s the desirable product sitting in front of everything required to manufacture desirability.
  • LANDSCAPE
    • 48 × 36″ vertical
    • A woman’s torso is cropped so aggressively that it’s initially almost abstract.
    • Tiny grain elevator.
    • Tiny wind turbine.
    • Tiny farmhouse.
    • The scale relationship makes absolutely no physical sense.
    • Intimate body / enormous landscape.
    • The thing photographed from twelve inches away and the thing seen from twelve miles away occupy the same plane.
  • WOOD
    • vertical wood strips forming the panel.
    • Some stop.
    • Some extend.
    • Some are slightly misaligned.
    • Corn rows cross them.
    • Body crosses them.
    • Wild vegetation appears in the seams.
    • Maybe certain passages remain bare wood.
    • The object itself begins exhibiting:
      • cultivation / interruption / repair / boundary / fragmentation.
    • toward the less precious painting language without artificially “painting looser.”
  • BREASTS
    • Biological.
    • Sexual.
    • Nutritional.
    • Commercialized.
    • Private.
    • Publicly regulated.
    • Desired.
    • Embarrassing.
    • Motherly.
    • Pornographic.
    • Completely ordinary anatomy.
    • exploitation?! They are sexual images!
      • The woman who sends someone a titty pic knows she’s creating a sexual image.
      • The recipient knows it.
      • The little charge created by that exchange is part of the subject
      • Sanitizing that would actually disrespect the phenomenon
    • interested in
      • sexual agency
      • desirability
      • presentation
      • cropping
      • transaction
      • commodification
      • the construction of an image,
      • rather than simply saying I enjoy looking at naked women, therefore I painted some.
        • Corn doesn’t excuse the nudity.
        • Corn complicates it.
        • And the nudity complicates the corn.
  • That’s the double-good-idea thing
  • avoid art school surrealism, clear environmental activism, ham handed narratives, just superimposing imagery and letting people figure it out. Keep distinct. Crisp distinction. Not blending and melting.
  • Tit pic selfie with an ear of corn in hand instead of phone.

Every grain elevator is painted as though it’s the steeple of a cathedral devoted to industrial agriculture.

CONSTRUCTION

  • Instead of layering, have the different picket cutouts meet with a clean edge like a puzzle
  • pickets can be held with a think panel behind glued and tacked on
  • imagery on panel bleeds through
  • Precision isn’t the problem.
  • Predetermination might be.

🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜🌽🚜

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

The Name Is a Symptom


what’s in a name?

For over a year I’ve been trying to find the name that can best reflecte my artistic identity as a true reflection of me, my art, and why I make it. I’ve worked under several different names over the years as I’ve grown, my work has evolved, and my life has changed. It has been said that you aren’t just selling your art but yourself, and I have wanted to make sure that the name on my art is as much a part of the art as the imagery, style and materials I use. It all needs to be working toward the same goal. I was looking for a name that would match my identity rather than looking for an identity I want to match it.

I’ve tried dozens. Some clever. Some ridiculous. Some that felt perfect…until they didn’t. During the process, I kept assuming I was searching for a better name and perhaps I was, but it was bigger than that. Turns out I was searching for a better understanding of myself and my motivations and the role I want to fill as a midwest folk trickster and what approach I will be taking as I begin making art that will reflect this new world that I occupy.


Discovery

As I continued to go in circles, wrapping myself a name, trying it on, sitting with it, and eventually growing more uncomfortable with it, I discovered something. Every name I liked six months ago reflected who I used to think I wanted to be. Not who I’m becoming. The trouble was, I wasn’t yet sure who that person was. I think I’m finally beginning to figure that out.


The Pattern

I was stuck believing I wanted people to think:

  • funny
  • irreverent
  • lowbrow
  • approachable

But when I looked at the words I’ve been using to describe my work lately, a different pattern appeared. Now I keep saying things like:

  • grounded
  • weathered
  • industrial
  • prairie
  • agricultural
  • handmade
  • dry
  • ironic without being sarcastic
  • healthy skepticism
  • Midwestern

What I thought was a branding exercise was really an exercise in defining my identity. A name to reflect my purpose.


previous iterations

Moe Profane

As I was hitting my middle 30s, my creative itch had been fermenting for years, building until it finally exploded into my first mature body of work. I had read about the Stuckist movement in the UK and their leader, Billy Childish. His art didn’t resonate with me, but the way his name reflected his motivations and purpose really stuck with me. The recovering Catholic side of me decided to make art under the name Moe Profane which would also match the persona I had already been cultivating in the Louisville, KY hipster/art/music scene. Moe Profane was my id. He said and painted things that I never would have.

Dick Van Der Wurst

It wasn’t long after that I began to grow more and more uncomfortable with the name. It seemed silly. I was older and less angry. I wanted to be lighter and less negative. I looked for a name that would embrace the Texas German heritage and reflect some of the pop culture and humor as well. An annual South Texas event, Wurstfest (sausage festival) inspired wonderful puns (wurst/worst), and “Dick” worked as a not-so-subtle nod toward my still somewhat irreverent iconoclastic worldview.

Mikey Likey

My move to Illinois got me thinking that I needed something a bit more grounded and less silly, but every bit as connected to my work. I gravitated toward the name and eventually embraced “Mikey Likey,” but I believe now that I was too eager to settle the matter and was settling because it was familiar. It is a phrase I have said enough times that my sister actually uses it as a playful nickname for me. It felt poppy and fun and positive. It seemed perfect for a while, but soon I was having doubts. I didn’t want a name that might eventually make me cringe when introducing myself.

It isn’t that I dislike the name. I dislike the assumptions it creates. It sounds playful. Not serious. Young and cute. Not strong and grounded. It isn’t subtle. Just too much of the wrong vibe. Meant to be ironic, it risked just being a silly joke no one got. I feared it might require me to project myself in an inauthentic way in order to meet the expectations it would put in people’s heads. That’s not what I really wanted or needed.


The better question

Eventually I stumbled upon a better question to ask while judging how well a name would work.

Instead of asking:

“Do I like this name?”

I started asking:

“What kind of man do I want people to imagine before they see the paintings?”

That question led me where I needed to go.


Then I heard a name…

As time passed I kept encountering names that would have me asking, “Oh, damn. Why didn’t I think of that before? I wish I had chosen something like that.” Then a name appeared that I thought was perfect. Woodcock. Strong, independent, authentic…I figured if I combined it with the right first name it could have just a hint of old school “TV detective” and “male porn star” in the same way I have wanted names in the past to have a kind of anti-establishment, punk rocker type of vibe. Real enough to not sound invented, but just perfect enough that someone might stop and think, “That name is so spot on, it almost sounds made up” rather than “Oh wow, he made up a funny name.”

I was feeling that it wasn’t so much…

“That’s funny.”

But instead more of…

“That sounds like a guy who has busted a few knuckles.”


New Perspective

I realized I was inadvertently trying to invent a persona when what I actually want is to discover my own…and label it. My art and I really have no need for a persona at all. The best artist name might not be the funniest. Or the cleverest.

When I checked Google to see if there other Otis Woodcocks out there that might give me reason to avoid that name, I found one. But rather than discouraging me, it reassure me. The moment I put this fact to that name, I knew I didn’t want to be ol’ Otis “Woody” Woodcock, but this shared name would embody an attitude my authentic self would be able to comfortably deliver.

It felt like a name that had existed long before I found it.

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

The Work Behind the Work

This journal is about building a record of my “light bulb” moments. Including the one I had about how to structure and use my blog.

What I’m after

What happens to all the thinking that never makes it into a painting? I take many different journeys conceptually and intellectually and they don’t all have a direct impact on a particular piece of art. I wanted to figure out how to use this blog to capture the moments when they journeys lead to a new understanding and direction. I want to look back and trace where I have been and how I’ve arrived at where I am. Maybe someday, it will interest other people too, but that doesn’t matter.


Where i’m coming from

I’ve never been very interested in explaining my artwork. I always say, “these aren’t editorial cartoons.” They don’t need you to “get” them for me to consider them a success. They come together in a flurry of brainstorming, free associating, and contemplation mixed in with the occasional “splash of color” just to make the composition hold together better. They don’t usually tell a neat little story. They chronicle a intellectual journey I’ve taken. And just as David Burne once said about writing about music being like dancing about architecture, if I try to verbalize about what I make too much, it just kills the magic that might happen when someone else takes a look and recognizes something unique to them.

If a painting needs a page of text to make it interesting, I’ve probably missed something. I’m not illustrating someone’s philosophy and I’m not being overly clever so dwelling on a piece too much after it’s done and snapping it’s picture is enough post mortem for me. What interests me more is documenting everything that happens before the painting exists.

  • Mapping out the rabbit holes.
  • Reexamining the dead end ideas.
  • Exploring the paths I could have taken.
  • Thanking the art gods for decisions that didn’t stick.
  • Cataloging the symbols that keep showing up before I know why.
  • Reliving the writings, conversations, jokes, and minced oaths that eventually become part of the work.

If not for this, most of that would disappear. This is my attempt to keep some of it around. Not because it’s important but because it’s the secret sauce that goes into making something worth painting. And it is a treasure chest to be sorted through for more inspirations and branching ideas in unanticipated directions.


What happened

I realized I don’t want to keep a regularly cadenced journal of everyday things. I want to keep a record of discoveries. Not every path I take leads to changes in how I think. Not every idea deserves an entry. But every once in a while, a light bulb illuminates brightly through the fog my ADHD addled mind. A question gets answered or is replaced by a better question.

Those moments are worth saving, and so, here I am.


What Changed here

I stopped defaulting to thinking I need to document what I do and I realized it would be more useful to me later and more likely to motivate me now if I simply documented how my ideas evolve.

This digging deeper into the dry hole of my process will capture the sparks. The paintings are only one visible part of a much longer process that ignites them.


what to forget

  • Treating this like a traditional blog.
  • Explaining the meaning of every painting.
  • Recording conversations simply because they happened.

what to remember

Documenting the creative process as part of the artwork without becoming an explanation of it. Don’t kill the magic. Add to it.

The mission statement for this collection of thoughts will be:

Focus on the "light bulb" moments that come about after a process of exploration and discovery. 

Anything more is just documenting dumb shit.

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

Who needs a cartoonist now?

Reading a 1967 “draw cartoons” book by Jack Hamm. In it he says, “Mankind has passed through many ages and stages, and these changes have made some professions and lines of work obsolete. However, it is fairly safe to say we will remain forever in the ‘Picture Age.’ Our accelerated pace of living finds us seizing on pictures which can be grasped in a flash. An, in a world overrun by peril and tragedy, humorous pictures are wanted. the relief-bringing cartoon gives us a all a much needed lift.”

The point here is of course to assure us that learning the cartooning skill will pay off because the need for human generated humorous images will never go away.

Uh huh.

He’s mostly right. We will always need humor, or at least want it as a release. But his implication that cartooning will be the source of this didn’t anticipate all the crazy AI imagery out there. I don’t have any taste for much of it floating around, but despite the downsides, like most technology, there have been some good results. I’m not saying the good outweighs the bad, and I’m not going to stand here and defend AI generated images in the least. I am just going to say that some of that stuff is so bizarre and random and humorous that it has become, in the right hands, an interesting new way to express oneself. Of course the hand of the artist is lost but the mind of the comedian can be seen in the use of interesting and well crafted prompts. Crap prompts will result in crap images, but coming at it with compelling and interesting prompts can be combined with unexpected processing by the computers that result in something completely unexpected. Never mind that to me that some of the most ridiculous, surreal, compellingly odd images AI makes come from its limitations and mistakes. As it gets “smarter” these are happening less and less and that’s a shame. I kind of loved seeing the AI fuck up. Reveling in its failures with a kind of schadenfreude and laughing at how ridiculous it all was. But anyway.

We are far from computers actually being funny at all. But they are already starting to murder the cartoonists. Yet, here I am. A desk jokey designer who put down his pencil years ago, in favor for the mouse that was already in my hand 8 hour per day, illustrating digitally. I have long wanted to focus on drawing again, and actually trying to master the craft of cartooning rather than relying on what I just picked up naturally as a younger person copying Garfield cartoons. As I’m getting started on what I hope is a new morning ritual, I stumble up on the above quote and had to pause and reflect through the lens of today’s AI reality and the clash of technology and human artistry. And thus…I asked AI to generate a cartoon about that quote. LOL. Fuck it. And fuck you. If my using AI in ironic ways to make myself laugh, hastens our doom, then darn. Sooner better than later.

ME: make a classic 1950s style editorial cartoon panel that highlights the irony of this quote in a time when AI can generate any kind of imagery with a few well chosen word prompts and put to rest any need for the human hand.

“Mankind has passed through many ages and stages, and these changes have made some professions and lines of work obsolete. However, it is fairly safe to say we will remain forever in the ‘Picture Age.’ Our accelerated pace of living finds us seizing on pictures which can be grasped in a flash. An, in a world overrun by peril and tragedy, humorous pictures are wanted. the relief-bringing cartoon gives us a all a much needed lift.”

ChatGTP:

Okay. So let’s critique. It’s very literal and not particularly funny. I tried to get it to highlight the irony in hopes it could come up with something there, but it didn’t. The cartoon in the image is pretty weird. The deformities and extra appendages and smiling people exploding aand flying around. The rest is pretty well done which tells me that a more precise prompt with an actual human generated specific humorous idea in mind could be illustrated fairly well and quickly. Leaving the concept still with the human.

I actually feels this is just one more technology that makes what is actually made by the human hand more precious and valuable, not less. AI will be a cheap knock off like so many commercial printing methods. What struck me most was the stack of books on the bottom left. Those are all professions (except cartoonists and illustrators, so far) that have been relegated to the past by technologies predating AI by decades and centuries. What’s two more? I don’t know. How much is too much? I don’t know. All I know is that it’s been happening to all forms of image making, technology making things easier faster and cheaper to make with machines, rather than humans. AI design and illustration is just one more. We may be correct in acting like it is a signal of the end days, or we may just be the next group of dinosaurs on the edge of the evolutionary cliff, and all of our protests will be irrelevant and forgotten the same as all the John Henrys and their sledge hammers.

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

How I might fit into the midwest art world

Today I heard it expressed that something interesting is happening in the midwest, post industrial, agro-industrial cities like chicago, st louis, indianapolis. For decades, contemporary American art has largely been driven by New York, Los Angeles, and increasingly online/global discourse. Much of it revolves around identity, theory, institutional critique, or highly polished market-friendly objects.

The Midwest seems to be moving in another direction.

That is being seen in What I’m see in Chicago especially, but also St. Louis, Indianapolis, Milwaukee, Cincinnati, Pittsburgh, Detroit, and smaller university cities—is a renewed interest in making work that is:

  • materially grounded!
  • handmade!
  • humorous!
  • philosophically curious!
  • suspicious of certainty!
  • regional without being nostalgic!
  • intellectually ambitious without academic jargon!

A recent Chicago exhibition even framed this as a distinctly *”Midwestern” conceptualism*: artists embracing slowness, studied nonchalance, and resisting the pressure to constantly produce or optimize. The curators described it as a “Midwestern alternative to the demands of artistic production as a rat race.”

An anthropologist at MIT recently proposed the term “paraindustrial.”

Instead of industry disappearing, industry and its ruins now coexist:

  • abandoned grain elevators
  • active rail lines
  • logistics warehouses
  • Amazon fulfillment centers
  • old brick factories
  • data centers
  • soybean fields
  • biotech labs

None of these erased the others.

They all exist simultaneously. The Midwest has become a landscape where every historical layer remains visible.

Things I need to think about and learn about next:

  • the way Chicago Imagists used humor rather than irony.
  • using humor as a philosophical tool rather than just a visual style.
  • how the Imagists believed high culture and low culture were artificial distinctions and could co-exist.
  • what their on going influence and legacy is today.

What I learned already is that my brand of pop art aligns with them more than any other. Rather than being cool, detached, emotionally flat, they focus on handmade, funny, awkward, persona, mystical, psychological. Not just observing culture, but inhabiting it.

Like a joke makes you briefly hold two contradictory ideas at once, that is what my work does. Not making visual jokes though, but rather using humor to destabilize certainty.

I certainly don’t look at their work and find imagery that is similar to mine, but the philosophy is spot on. LOL.

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

The Best Damn Pet Portraits in All the Land

Pet portraits are always fun. Here are some painting and illustrations I have done to immortalize people’s precious pets. Contact me if you’re interested in me capturing your critter’s likeness for the rest of time or until the acrylic turns to dust.

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

Just Live a Bit More Simply, Fatty

If things we don’t need but really like are going to be more expensive, tough shit.

Y’all have to know the pressure America has always put on brown people around the world to provide us with this unsustainable standard of living.

I’m not in favor of how Trump is handling this shit nor his motivations in doing so, I’m just saying. We aren’t owed all this relative luxury our country is flooded with and while we may enjoy it, it comes at a cost.

Maybe just consume less, live simple and fucking vote next time.

Photo Credit: https://easy-peasy.ai/ai-image-generator/images/unsustainable-cityscape-environmental-destruction-overdevelopment

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

The Creation of a Master Piece – How it all comes together.

Here you can see the steps involved in creating a WOODCOCK piece.

  • Harbinger: For the Love of God painting of a 4 legged AI generated fat ugly angel above octopus tentacles holding Lone Star beer cans.

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏

Relative Sexiness of High Angle Cleavage Selfies

What is up with all the high angle pics certain women post on social media? I understand that it’s a simple trick to make yourself look more attractive, but why are we not more self aware that we are blatantly trying to obscure our true selves? So high angle pics make you look more attractive but then many women will complain about the people these pics inspire to contact them…and yet they continue to post them, every day, over and over.

So what? Who cares? Well not only is it interesting to me that so many people will repeatedly use such obvious tricks, but why it works! The angles of pics incorporate aspects of both physical and philosophical relativism. The subjective “truth” of how beautiful someone is depends on the relative angle of the observer.

Relativism about truth is the claim that what is true for one individual, or one social group, may not be true for another and that every effort to adjudicate between context-dependent standards of truth and falsity is bound to be futile.

ScienceDirect.com

But it isn’t only for women. Men can appear to be more attractive and dominant, accentuating features of male prowess by taking pics from LOWER angles.

The journal Psychological Science (Makhanova et al., 2017).

  • People’s physical position relative to others may shape how those others perceive them.
  • people use relative physical position to manage impressions by strategically positioning themselves either higher or lower relative to ostensible observers.
  • Five studies supported the prediction that women take and display photographs portraying themselves in a low relative physical position to highlight their youthful features and appear attractive
  • whereas men take and display photographs portraying themselves in a high relative physical position to highlight their size and appear dominant. 
  • as do members of other social species, people use relative physical position to manage social impressions, and although these impression-management strategies may have deep ancestral roots, they appear to manifest themselves through a contemporary human modality-photographs.

Women

…being viewed from above (a downward angle) amplifies signs of youth and attractiveness, such as having a large eyes and forehead, and thus appears to be consistent with women’s motives.

Indeed, women appear more attractive when their heads are tilted down and they are thus viewed from a downward angle.

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28485703/

Men

“Being viewed from below (an upward angle) amplifies
signs of dominance, such as height and a large jaw, and thus appears to be consistent with men’s motives.

Indeed, targets appear more dominant when their heads are tilted back and they are thus viewed from an upward angle.”

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28485703/

Interestingly, the researchers found that men and women take pictures from different angles depending on their motive.

Women:

  • tend to take selfies from above when trying to appear more attractive
  • when the picture is aimed at other women, they take the picture straight on.
  • tended to take their online dating selfies from above.

Men:

  • showed no particular preference for dating pictures.
  • switched from a low-angle selfie for attracting women
  • to a straight-on selfie if the audience was thought to be other men.

And so I am working on this series of paintings that feature high angle pics of women that accentuate their feminine beauty. I incorporate an unsettling gaze into the view’s eyes that shows a bold, unwavering confidence in what they are doing. Also included are examples of mating displays from the animal kingdom as well as hints of underlying discomfort that is always present when you can’t back up the reality you’re trying to project.

Keep digging, WOODCOCK 🪏